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27 November 2002 @ 11:56 am
im leaving in two hours...  
...and i have six hours worth of stuff to do. im very scared right now. i have a drs. appt. in three brief hours and he'll give me a rather large shot. i have a rather large fear of needles. but this in itself is not the scary part. i pride myself on never crying. ESPECIALLY about pain. so it is extremely grievous to my spirit to realize i have never received a shot without crying. im sure that dr. goldberg thinks i am a great big girl or something equally revolting. but on the other hand, ive been crying the past couple of days because it hurts so bad so i guess im a big girl anyway. also, the pain has made me so nauseous, all i can eat is crackers and cinnamon toast. although last night i did manage to keep down some gingerbread my brother made. i want some real food so i should probably go ahead and suck it up and go.

i cant even function properly. everything im supposed to do today i cant remember how to do it and im getting mad about everything everyone asks me to do. i cant continue on like this...somethings gotta change....

*sigh* i miss danielle. i wish i was with her right now. *sigh* id even put up with the chipotle everything to see her again.
i miss karris too. and she only lives twenty minutes away.
love all of you. dont think im depressed. im sure its mostly the pain talking. but i still miss danielle. even if i was healthy.

love love,
the next christopher reeve
Current Mood: bitchybitchy
Campbell Coneycampbellconey on November 27th, 2002 12:10 pm (UTC)
Don't cry, poor thing! You'll be okay! Is the shot the only thing they can give you? Couldn't they give you a pill or something?

queenie b: laughing eyesbluebirdgirl on November 28th, 2002 08:39 am (UTC)
i practically live on pills as it is. i have to get cortisone shots every so often to ease the bursitis in my hip. its just one more of the things i have to endure until the end comes. (soon i hope)
thanks for your concern.
love you dear.
(Deleted comment)
queenie bbluebirdgirl on November 28th, 2002 08:40 am (UTC)
i love you as well dearest.
she's sick from chlorine but she'll never be clean: i see yousoftest_fire on November 27th, 2002 03:05 pm (UTC)
my dear sister
i know how you feel, and i know it must be pretty bad to endure a needle.. (remember how i had to get 3 shots for migraines) poor dear... sometimes crying makes you feel better, dont feel you have to be brave, you can be a little girl and cry and its ok, ill never think anything different of you..

i love you dear
i hope you get some rest
i hope you feel better
ill call you

love always
danielle :]
queenie bbluebirdgirl on November 28th, 2002 08:43 am (UTC)
Re: my dear sister
i actually DID sleep, got more vicoden, got the shot and didnt cry than watched that movie you like so much and bawled like a baby. i know you understand what im going through and i appreciate how much you care for me.
love you dear so much.
i called you last night but you werent there.
call me soon.

love love love you,